Post-Op

I had my post-op appt yesterday. My main concern was having to get drained. The tumor was so big that when I do heal I will have a deformity. My doc warned me that if my surgical breast didn't look smaller than the other one, then I'd probably need to have fluid removed. This is all I worried about. I just wanted him to look at me and tell me to have a good day. Yeah, not so much.

When I initially found out I was having surgery, I was all about awareness and I was super emotional. Once the tumor was removed I was so different. I didn't wanna talk about it anymore. I didn't wanna answer questions. I just wanted to forget about it and move on with a normal life! Well, I'm back to spreading the word.

Yesterday at my appointment I didn't have to get drained, although now that doesn't seem so bad! Because my tumor is so rare, it's not graded like other cancers that are Stage 1, 2, 3, or 4; mine was graded "low-grade malignant" which means more scans and a partial mastectomy to remove more breast tissue/margins around where my lump was to ensure EVERY foreign cell is removed. DAMN! I'll be even more deformed after the second surgery and I soooo thought it was all over! Of course I balled on the way home.

This tumor is quite rare and makes up only 1% of all breast tumors/cancers - I'm officially a case study. Kinda cool. Once I have my next surgery I will have frequent scans to make sure nothing has returned. There is no cure for this yet and again chemo, radiation, and medication don't work on this thing. Since my Phyllodes Tumor is infamous for returning, we will discuss removing my entire breast (total mastectomy) if it comes back. I'm not really down with that, but I will deal with it later.

I was supposed to be back to work August 23, but now I won't be returning until mid-September sometime. While this is stressful at times and puts a strain on me financially, I get an occasional kick in the butt from my friends who remind me that my health takes precedence over any money or job. So I will keep my chin up and look on the bright side of not having to work out in the Las Vegas heat this summer! Hollaaaaa...

I've been wanting to move to San Diego since I was a teenager and decided a couple of months ago to stop talking and take action. I got rid of my 4 bedroom house and put ALL of my things in storage, with the exception of my clothes and Roxy G. I moved in with a childhood friend of mine in an attempt to save money. Soon I could finally move to my dream city because for once in my life I wasn't involved in a relationship, which is what always trapped me in Vegas. Shortly after this I ended up on medical leave. I'm living proof that things happen for a reason. If I had to deal with this while still in my house, I have no clue what I would have done financially. My wonderful friend Carly provided me with this roof over my head while I got my health straightened out. Everything has fallen right into place since my diagnosis.

I truly believe Phyllodes was given to me as a gift, that I was hand-picked for this one. I've had such great support and resources to get me through. I've met such wonderful Phyllodes friends who know just what to say when I'm completely discouraged. I've been asked several times how is it that I constantly smile and stay in a happy mood? It's only because I make a conscious decision to do so. So many other women have gone through way more than I have with doctors who had no clue what a Phyllodes tumor even was or insurance companies refusing to pay for their mammograms because they were "too young" to need one. I'm truly fortunate and will take advantage of this tumor by telling EVERYONE about it and setting a positive example. I will show people how important early detection is and help people realize that no one is exempt. This is why this tumor was handed to me special delivery style!

PLEASE CHECK YOURSELVES as I leave you with a pic of my tumor that took up such a large space in my breast...3.8cm in February to 7.2cm in July when it was removed...my next surgery is Monday, August 24, 2009.

The Follow Up...

See, I had a feeling this wasn't over...

I haven't written in a while. After my biopsy report came back negative for cancer, I never wanted to see this blog ever again! Well, I'm back.

You read it right, back in February my biopsy results showed no cancer cells. I was diagnosed with a Fibroadenoma (remember that for later), a very common benign tumor in women my age. I was so relieved and so happy it was all over with! The nurse from my OB office called and gave me the great news over the phone. She was ready to hang up when I said WAIT!! I told her I want this thing out!! She sounded a little surprised and responded with, "Oh. Well, you don't really need to have it removed but if you choose that option then you'll just have to find a general surgeon on your insurance plan." Uuuuhhh, ok then.

I shared the great news with my friends and informed them that I really didn't even have to go through surgery! YAY! Yeah, telling that to a bunch of paramedics and nurses doesn't really call for a celebration! No one was impressed with this conclusion. The general consensus was there's NO way I should walk around with this hunk of junk marinating in me. Ok fine. So I'll handle it, but not right now. I had a bunch of little mini-vacations planned and I wanted to enjoy life for a little bit! That's exactly what I did. What's the rush??

Alright, so the vacations were over and my next one isn't scheduled until November. Now it was time to handle this lovely lady lump that everyone's been on me about. I got the name of an awesome breast specialist and made my surgical consult. It seemed to me that my lump was getting bigger. I've been going to the gym and eating better and I realize things may have shifted and repositioned and that this could just be some paranoia surfacing.

My appointment was on Tuesday, June 30, 2009. The doctor looked at my scans from February and let out a big "WHOAH!" Yeah, it's huge. I know. I've tried to tell people just how big this thing is but it's really hard to grasp, no pun intended. When I let him know it felt bigger, he immediately brought in his ultrasound machine and hooked me up himself. He wasn't excited about what he was seeing. He was very professional and calm and objective. He's a pro - he's not here to freak me out. It's all business, and I get it. Here it is in perspective...the average tumor size is 1.5 cm. In February my tumor was 3.8 cm, and today (just a few months later) it has blown up to a whopping 7.2 cm. Ok, once he told me this I was officially worried. I mean, if he let out a big "whoah" when looking at my mammogram from February, what's he wanting to say about it now that it's almost double in size??

Long story short, he's calling this a Phyllodes tumor. It's a form of breast cancer that is often mistaken for a Fibroadenoma, which was my initial diagnosis. I had a few questions about this that were later answered by the breast cancer website when I went home. Here are some of those answers...

"Phyllodes tumors account for less than 1% of all breast cancers. Even if the tumor is benign, it is still considered a type of breast cancer, because it has the potential to become malignant...This type of breast tumor grows very fast — so much so that the lump can become bigger in a couple of weeks. Since a Phyllodes tumor may resemble a fibroadenoma, these two conditions are often mistaken for each other...Neither a mammogram nor a breast ultrasound can clearly distinguish between a fibroadenoma and a phyllodes tumor...Cells from a needle biopsy can be tested in the lab but seldom give a clear diagnosis. An open surgical biopsy, which results in a slice of tissue, will provide a better sample of cells and will result in a proper diagnosis for a Phyllodes tumor...Surgery to remove a Phyllodes tumor is the standard treatment. This type of tumor does not respond well to radiation, chemotherapy or hormonal therapies."

Why didn't all the scans catch it?? Why didn't my initial biopsy catch it?? Why is it growing so fast?? All the answers to my questions right there! Scans can't give a definitive diagnosis because it looks much like a Fribroadenoma. A needle biopsy, which pulls out small bits of tissue for testing, doesn't offer enough cells to get a clear diagnosis. A phyllodes tumor requires a good, full slice of tissue to get a consistent reading. It all makes sense now. For all of us in the medical profession, we can spot heart attacks or infections or diabetic issues a mile away. We do EKGs and blood sugars and blood pressures so we have proof on paper, but we know when people are sick. It's what we do. Just as this doctor knew to call this a Phyllodes tumor. Of course he needs to do his thing to get it all on paper, but his final words were "If it looks like a duck and walks like a duck, it's a duck."

I'm so thankful for the friends who pushed me and wouldn't allow this thing to rent space in my breast for free. The upside is, I won't ever have to go through chemo or radiation, since this particular tumor doesn't respond to either. If this were to ever spread throughout my body, the downside would be that chemo and radiation could never get me better. I don't think I'll ever have to worry about that though. I can't be mad at any doctors or pathologists for saying I was homefree back in February. Everyone did their part and their job when and how they were supposed to. Period. My point is, I found this lump on my own. If everyone would just examine themselves and become familiar with what feels normal for their body and what feels foreign, lives could be saved. It's also so very important to get second or third opinions. I walked around for 5 months after my first biopsy thinking I was healthy, all the while this monster was growing rapidly inside me. This is YOUR body, and you only get one. I'm healthy and young and things happen for no rhyme or reason. I'm posting a VERY personal pic of my "old" mammogram from February, taken before this grew to the ridiculous 7.2cm by July. This is a view of me getting squashed in the vice grip, as if I were looking straight down at my own right breast. I just want everyone to be aware. Starting now.

I'm scheduled for a lumpectomy on Monday, July 13th, 2009. I'll be off for 6 LONG weeks. What the heck am I going to do for a month and a half?? I've shed a couple of tears here and there and I'm sure as surgery gets closer I'll be more emotional. The surgeon will send my tumor in for another biopsy and this time there will be plenty of tissue to properly diagnose me, and get it on paper. If it looks like a duck and walks like a duck...